Don't Worry About the Jacket
by SilaOfCreo
Summary: Kurt's used to dumpster dives.  Sam isn't, so he makes his own rules.


A/n: I don't own any aspect of Glee at all. Please ignore the subtle hints of Puckurt.

Don't Worry About the Jacket

Since Finn had moved back in with Kurt (albeit in a different room), there were few mornings when Kurt went into school (unprotected) without Finn by his side. This morning, however, was the exception because Finn was ill. The night before, he, Mike and Puck had a contest to see who could eat the most pizza. Finn won.

This morning, Azimio, Karofsky, some other particularly ugly Neanderthals, and a heavenly, handsome blonde piece of meat stood by the dumpster looking only somewhat menacing. When Kurt tried to nonchalantly (in his bright orange and black outfit celebrating Halloween) pass by the dumpster unnoticed, the jocks accosted him.

It hadn't happened for quite some time, but Kurt was still used to it, so he started to take off his bag when Azimio addressed the good-looking one.

"You're up, Sam," _Oh, good name_, Kurt thought. "Throw the fag in the dumpster." _Did he just flinch?_

Kurt must have been imagining it because Sam nodded immediately and headed for Kurt. No heroics today, unfortunately.

When Sam had agreed to throw 'that fairy Hummel' in the dumpster, he had expected someone much less attractive. Surely, he hadn't expected to see the same boy (whose extremely tight pants) he had been staring at for weeks now from his locker which was eight doors down from Sam's own. Now that he was so close to the boy, he really wanted to hear what his voice sounded like, what he thought about Sam's outfit, what foods he liked, his favorite holiday, musical, fashion designer, TV show (but maybe he was too sophisticated to like television), season, animal, memory. He really didn't want to throw him in the dumpster…but he _really _didn't want to become an outcast (again).

"C'mon, Evans, pick him up," Karofsky whined, impatient.

Sam watched the boy (he still didn't know his first name and calling him Hummel sounded wrong) as he started to hand over his rucksack. Sam discreetly brushed hands with the boy and took the bag from him, flinging it over his shoulder.

The boy glared. Apparently, he thought that Sam was planning on stealing the bag. Nonetheless, he moved onto his jacket (and Sam really wanted to spout some cheesy pickup line about stripping in public), starting to unzip it. Sam watched those small hands pull the zipper down halfway. He noticed the _shhmp _noise that resulted and wondered if it would sound the same if Sam unzipped those skinny jeans.

With that thought merrily raping his brain, Sam grabbed the boy's wrists roughly, then gently placed them at his sides. (Later, Sam would realize how completely frightened the boy looked, but at that moment, all Sam could see was that skin tight black shirt beneath his jacket that stuck to his small-but-toned body and outlined every crease and fold of muscle.)

Sam slowly zipped up the jacket and subtly brushed against the boy's chest. Then, the boy made a small, soft, sweet noise like a kitten's meow. It was the sort of noise Sam's ex-girlfriend used to make when Sam touched her-_oh, shit. _Sam smirked; the boy looked horrified. Then Sam said, "Don't worry about the jacket."

It must have sounded condescending because as soon as the words left his mouth the jocks started laughing and the boy looked positively livid. So Sam decided that now was the time to put his impromptu wooing plan into action. He scooped the boy up and over his shoulder to much protestation and walked toward the school. This left the jocks so dumbfounded that they wouldn't realize what had happened until Sam and his boy were far away from them.

Kurt was likewise surprised by the lack of garbage on his jacket (it was the only orange one he owned, surprisingly). Besides, this knightly form of carrying was surprisingly pleasant…

…for about a minute before Kurt and his Knight actually entered the school at which point everyone started whispering and pointing. This Evans evidently had no idea how embarrassing it was to be carried around your school in the early- _Oh, God! That was Puck, and the bastard gave Sam the nod. And did he just wink at me? Don't wink! Help me, you imbecile!_

But Puck passed by with no other acknowledgements. The Knight and his Princess were getting dangerously close to Mercedes' locker.

So, Kurt tried something unprecedented.

"Hey, Evans-" (talking).

"It's Sam."

"Yes, well-"

"What's your name?"

Kurt sighed but answered, "Kurt Hummel."

"Nice name."

And as Sam said this, they passed Mercedes' locker. Her look of surprise and anger would have been hilarious if it hadn't been laced with amusement.

Before Mercedes could come to his rescue (and how mortifying would that be?), Kurt rushed to order, "Put me down, Sam. Now."

Sam obliged a moment later, and Kurt realized that they were at his locker. The jock smiled kindly at Kurt and held out his hand (blushing?). Kurt regarded the hand as something irritating for a moment before ignoring it completely and opening his locker. (He had all of his books in his bag, but he needed to do something mildly dramatic to show that the idea of shaking Sam's hand was offensive. Storming off Rachel Berry style seemed too dramatic for the situation.)

Kurt held out his hand and asked for his bag. Sam obliged, retracting the hand that had been fishing for a handshake.

At this point, as Kurt loaded unnecessary books in his bag, the two boys noticed that Mercedes was watching their interactions intently and somewhat suspiciously. Sam looked abashed, but he remained in that same spot until Kurt finished gathering his books.

Mercedes sighed and glared at Sam. "What do you want, white boy?"

"I wanted to talk to Kurt," he mumbled.

Here, Kurt and Mercedes must have had a psychic conversation because for about thirty seconds they did nothing but make faces at each other and let out annoyed noises. Then, Mercedes said, "Fine, but if I hear screaming, I won't come back to help you."

Kurt rewarded her with a big grin and promised to meet her in their first class. (Also, despite what Mercedes had previously said to Kurt, the look she gave Sam clearly said, "Hurt him and I'll kill you.")

Kurt turned to face Sam, grin gone and icy disposition back in place. Sam gulped, but decided that nothing could stop him from asking this question. Really, nothing could stop him. Sam had to ask this question because it could determine Sam's path for the rest of his life. (Kurt was becoming impatient.) If Sam didn't ask this question, he would regret it for the rest of his days. He would become a shell of man, desperately seekin-

"I'm going to be late," Kurt deadpanned.

Sam made a noise between a grunt and a groan (Kurt looked repulsed) before he finally blurted out, "Halloween is awesome."

Kurt blinked confusedly.

"I mean," Sam corrected, "Your clothes are all Halloween-y and that's awesome because Halloween…is awesome."

Kurt blinked again and Sam cringed beneath his gaze. Even though Kurt was shorter than him, he felt as if he was a child looking up at a disappointed (_Did he know what he'd meant to say?_) father.

But instead of berating Sam, Kurt simply shook his head and sighed, indicating more clearly than words could that this conversation had been a waste of time.

As Kurt walked away, Sam wished he could have asked that question:

_Wanna go on a date?_


End file.
